Michael and I were interviewed in December by William Brougham about our activism. I always enjoy an opportunity to express my thoughts about where things are with equal rights and the GLBTI community.
William has a good selection of interviews on his YouTube Channel that is worth working your way through. Many though provoking topics from a range of people.
Be sure to watch the whole 28 minutes here, for me I think one of the key points is the topic of the day, a plebiscite. This is Malcolm Turnbull’s deal with the right from the Abbott Regime. He seems determined to leave Abbott’s ill thought out concept in place at present, I think the whole notion is quite appalling and in the interview I explain why.
“Through the years, we all will be together, if the fate allows”
Christmas wrapped up for another year, and this Christmas again marks a change in the ever evolving tradition for me.
Christmas night as Michael (Did I say how much I love him?) and I walked along Beacon Cove after our Christmas Day he asked the question, “What is your earliest memory”. A question provoked as he recalled his return to Australia to the nearby Station Pier, he told me of his memory of standing on the deck of the Galileo. He was young.
The question is a good one that spun around in my head. Michael always manages to find questions to ask that generate a cascading effect. Earlier in the day he asked me if this Christmas was different, noting the change from this year to last year. He asked me how I felt about that.
Here’s my answers.
My childhood Christmas memories are of my family coming together on that one day to celebrate. I remember the excitement of Christmas morning. I would wake, often before sunrise, and find my Santa sack, a pillowcase put at the end of my bed the night before. I always tried to be as quiet as I possible could be, not wanting to wake anyone else! I would have been sharing my room with my younger brother and a couple of older brothers.
The pillowcase would be jammed pack full of goodies. It always had a Santa stocking in it. The stocking, very similar to the one pictured, would have some lollies along with cheap plastic toys, such as a whistle or a water pistol. This is a tradition that I continued on with my own children until recently. I do have a memory of feeling the sack in the dark and it being big and bulky, I’d give it a tug and pull out whatever I could without making too much noise. I can’t recall a single gift from it, apart from the stocking.
The next part of the day is the distribution of presents from under the tree. There was much anticipation for me. Our Christmas tree was always a real pine tree and often placed between a couple of the lounge room couches. I would be sure to have the best seat in the house. I would actually pick the seat the night before and when the announcement for presents was made I would be the first in the room and sitting as close to the action as possible.
I would have to wait for my older brothers to come home with their new families, my nephews and nieces. Dad would come into the lounge room and there would be a lot of chatter. He would start to distribute the gifts by calling the name of who it was for followed by who was giving it. “Gregory from Mum and Dad”. There were always a great big stack of gifts to give.
There are two presents that stand out in my memory. One was a cassette recorder. The other a Dolphin Torch.
The cassette recorder was probably one of the best gifts I ever received. It would have been in the late 1970’s and fed directly into my desire to be on the radio. I was able to pretend I was a real radio DJ with it! One of the first songs I ever recorded off the radio was Flash N the Pan’s Hey St. Peter. I remember that it broke, possibly a day after I got it, and I had to wait until the shops opened again so we could replace it.
The dolphin torch was something that I asked for. I needed it for camping, big, bulky and waterproof. The real reason I remember it however, was that it marked a change in my thinking on Christmas. I guess I was may 15 or 16, and that year the only gift I got from Mum and Dad was the torch. I felt a great deal of unhappiness about that! The Christmases of Plenty had passed.
As the family started to expand we all bought gifts for the new additions. We also bought gifts for each other. So, that’s 11 children, two parents and an ever-expanding growth of grand children and partners. There would be laughter, squeals of delight, the rustling of paper and a big mess everywhere. This tradition went on for many many years, all the way into the ’90s. That’s at least 20 years.
I’ll come back to this point in time, the mid 70s. Let me just explain this video of the presents under the tree. I took this in 1990. I’m 27 years old, my first wife (ok, my only wife) is the first adult through the door, she’s preceded by some of my nieces, a steady stream of children and adults come into the room. Finally in what seems like a TARDIS space we’re all in their and my Dad begins the handing out of the presents. You can see my Mum and Dad under the tree, bums up in the air, handing out the gifts.
This isn’t all of us either! By 1990, some of my older nephews and nieces, along with my brothers, didn’t come to this part of the day. We’d already started changing the long-held tradition and celebrating Christmas in our own way with our new families. This is one of the final times that we gathered in the family home at 9 McIntyre Street, Hamilton. My parents moved to Queensland and that changed Christmas forever.
Back to the 1970’s. Once the presents were over and done with we would then be getting ready for lunch. The size of our family meant we didn’t go anywhere. People came to us. As the years rolled on and we had my brothers wives and there children, we also had additional grandparents, uncles and aunts. We often had two sittings, and somehow my mother prepared both meals. At a guess we’d have about 30 for each meal, lunch and dinner.
Specific memories are a little faded, and all sorts of celebrations roll into one, I imagine that it was all very traditional. Two things about the food stand out, White Christmas Slice and Christmas Pudding.
The Christmas pudding was made by my mother’s mum, Grandma. I have a fleeting recollection of it hanging in a calico bag from the kitchen ceiling, months before Christmas. It was boiled in a special aluminium steamer pot and served with lashings of cream. I recall my Dad’s mother, Nana, being responsible for putting the sixpence in the slices. Yes, sixpence, even years after the move to decimal currency, she managed to use sixpence.
That was my Christmas day, full of family, laughter and good times.
Christmas is now much different. When Mum and Dad moved to Queensland that was the end of our family get togethers. By then I had children and we spent Christmas visiting my in-laws. That was nothing like my childhood Christmas. They were full of stress and anxiety. I got out of them as soon as I could when I separated, then I would spend Christmas day with my sister, Angela, much more relaxed.
This year, Christmas was lunch in the city with some good friends, followed by Christmas dinner with my children, Caitlin and Tomas, future son-in-law, their mother and my husband. For the first time Caitlin wasn’t here on Christmas morning, Angela and her family were in Queensland and I took a train ride to the city to have lunch in a restaurant.
Things change, my memories fade. All I’m left with are a few snippets and glimpses of how things once were. Christmas will continue to change.
In November Michael and I celebrated 7 years together.
What can I say. It didn’t take me very long to discover that Michael is a wonderful man, and after this short space of time, I understood that I wanted him in my life. I love him.
Like all relationships I need to give care and attention to it. I don’t always get it right, but I’m willing to change, adapt and learn from the experience of sharing our lives.
We are a married couple. He is my husband. For me it was important that I find a way to say to my family, my friends, and the rest of the world how important this relationship is to me. What better way to share the way I feel about Michael than a public declaration of my love for him. What better way than marriage to say to this key person what he means to me.
We traveled to New Zealand to get married. It was a quick trip, part of a TV documentary called Living With the Enemy.
That meant we had to share our special event with a fundamentalist priest from the Anglican sect of christianity. I remember him, Father David, many times asking us to explain why it was that we wanted to get married. Michael and I had to let him into our little secret. That we wanted to change the world! We wanted everyone to get gay married. As that seems unlikely it would seem that the reason for our marriage is based upon a mutual love for each other, the desire to share that with our family and community at large, and to say to each other just how important we are in each others lives.
Michael and I have been away for another couple of days in the Grampians. One of my most favourite places. A couple of days there feels like a couple of weeks.
One of the things I love about being there is the sheer difference between the macro and the micro.
Michael and I walked part of the way up Mt William, the Grampians’ tallest peak. We sat for a while and looked across the Mt William Range to the Major Mitchell Plateau and the Serra Range. An amazing macro view.
Our senses are filled with the wondrous view. The warm sun on your faces, the cold wind whistling between the rocks, the smell of eucalyptus trees. Then if you take the time to look closely you can see the micro.
You can see the dew clinging on the sun-dew flowers, the droplets glisten in the sunshine.
The micro world is getting ready to burst forth with its array of colours as the weather warms up. The orchids are just starting to bloom and they are always a treat.
Leopard Orchid
Waxlip Orchid
Somewhere between the big mountains and the tiny flowers is the wild life. A treat is the local sulphur-crested cockatoos that visited our room for the chance to nibble on some sunflower kernels.
Nothing like a few seeds to bring in a crowd. Each cockatoo has its own personality, this one carefully picks up each kernel to eat, another one would gather 4 or 5 at once, yet another would peck at your hand and others would be gentle. There were some that would approach carefully, headed cocked on one side to keep you in its view and one that jumped on our shoulder to get to the seed.
There are always plenty of birds in the Grampians, I could and do stand, stare, point and admire.
Kookaburra
As we’re walking down from the Picaninny, I can hear some twigs breaking so I stop and listen carefully, slowly spinning my head until I find a family of Gang-gang cockatoos sitting in a native pine eating the nuts.
Gang-gang Cockatoo
The highlight of the weekend however was the journey home. We stopped to take a short walk up Mt Noorat, just out of Terang. It’s a dormant volcano. The crater is an inverted cone. As we walked around the rim a flash of movement caught my eye as I turned my head to the left there was a single flap of wings and I came eye to eye with the wedge-tail eagle. We seemed to make eye contact and he let out a couple of short squawks as he glided past us.
We couldn’t believe our eyes. We had seen eagles before, off in the distance. This was close. We watched as he flapped and began to circle, keeping one eye us. It was just amazing.
As he circled back around and dipped back below the crater rim we waited for him to reappear. However, not everyone was as excited as us for this moment. As he flew over the tree tops the local magpie clearly thought he was a little too close for comfort.
An aerial battle began. It was very one-sided, the eagle not really very interested in the magpie. The magpie would be flapping its wings rapidly and I could hear that swooping noise as it flew towards the eagle. The eagle on the other hand effortlessly flapped twice and kept just ahead of its attacker. With an extra burst of flappiness the magpie managed to catch up and it swooped down on the larger bird and the eagle flapped a couple of times and continued on its way seemingly unconcerned. The magpie continued its assault and saw the bigger bird off.
The presence of this bird of prey had the mountain buzzing. The magpies began warbling, and as the eagle circled around the local population of birds began calling out their warnings.
Here’s a short video of the battle:
As we continued our drive home we stopped numerous times to take photographs of other birds, Nankeen Kestrel, Brown Falcon, a Black-shouldered Kite
Nankeen Kestrel
Brown falcon
Black-shouldered Kite
Each a delight to look at.
Take some time to flip through Michael’s photos – They are well worth it!
Just last week in Jerusalem, at their annual pride march, a man described as an ultra-orthodox Jew stabbed 6 people. He was heard to say that he was doing the work of god.
We balance this with the news this week from the Jewish Community Council of Victoria (JCCV) who admitted Keshet, a group for gay Jews into their association. Showing us that despite religion, you can actually accept people for who they are.
The JCCV decision comes at the end of a very long road of agitation and negotiation by my husband, Michael Barnett. He has no direct involvement with Keshet, but he has been tirelessly working away in the background.
Several years ago he broke off communication with the JCCV, well, the other way around, they stopped communicating with him, he has been working hard to change opinions, to challenge the status quo and to break through.
The journey for Michael goes back to 1999 when the JCCV decided not to admit Aleph, another support group for gay Jews, into their ranks. In fact, not only were they against it there were a number of ultra-orthodox organisations that said some particularly nasty things.
I haven’t known Michael for that long. In our time together I have watched him take on the JCCV leadership and tell them things that they just didn’t want to hear. And this journey has not been easy.
I recall sitting at a meeting with Aleph and the JCCV and the response from the JCCV leadership was less than desirable and amounted to Michael being abused and yelled at.
The JCCV then established their own GLBTI Reference Group and froze Michael out. Despite this he continued to do his work of trying to break down the barriers for young gay Jews, always with the aim of removing those barriers to help reduce the suicide rate for those growing up in the Melbourne Jewish community.
Michael may never be recognised for the job he has done. You can’t take your finger and trace a map of the 1999 Aleph knock back to the Keshet acceptance.
Keshet becoming an associate of the JCCV is a lot of work by many people, the current JCCV leadership has steered the way and the Keshet team have been fully engaged.
Michael has also been putting in and talking with people along the way, doing what he does so well. Making connections.
The road to today has been carved by Michael Barnett, others have come along behind him and been able to take advantage of his work. That’s the way it works.
I and indeed our family have supported Michael in this journey, we’ve been the sounding board, his personal advice centre. We’ve had the tough conversations, we’ve acknowledged when the good things happen. We heard his pain, we saw it on a regular basis. Above all we took this man and loved him. Because he was right.
The important part here is that finally we have the orthodox part of the JCCV supporting the gay people, accepting them, becoming a better and more whole community. The same people who opposed this move all those years ago. This will have an effect on those young questioning people. Maybe this acceptance will save lives.
My admiration for Michael is boundless. In the face of adversity he has stayed the path.
I’ve told Michael that he should take pride in this result. It is his work that delivered this result.
My eyes have been focussed on Ireland as they voted in a referendum to change their constitution to broaden the definition of marriage in that country.
“marriage may be contracted in accordance with law by two persons without distinction as to their sex”
Just so we’re clear, it’s not gay marriage nor is it the right to marry a dog, several hundred other people or a bridge. It’s the right to contract in accordance with the law the right to marry another person. You could be gay, straight, bisexual, transgendered or just plain and simply you. All you need is another single person and you can get married.
The people said yes.
There has been much celebrating in Ireland and around the world. It’s historic as it’s the first country to vote on marriage equality. Of course, there are those that are upset about the result, such as Lyle Shelton – head straight man at the Australian Christian Lobby – scared of anything that isn’t just like him. He very quickly published a media release to tell everyone else just what we should be thinking! He sums up his whole approach right there in the headline:
Irish marriage referendum a blow to the rights of children
He seems to ignore the 18 countries where it’s ok to get married and guess what, the kids are ok! He’s not focussed on the Royal Commission on Institutional sex abuse where the rights of kids have been ignored and destroyed. Nor has he focussed on the rape and abuse of asylum seekers. No, no, he in his writings suggest that gay people are somehow causing harm to the rights of children.
The redefinition of marriage and family in Ireland this weekend is a wake-up call to Australians who value the rights of children and freedom of belief.
Yes, it’s a wake up call – the decision has been made by the people. Not by a few lobbyists who head an outdated religious lobby group. Of course, family has not been redefined in Ireland. Just who is allowed to get married, and even then, it’s not so much as a redefinition, but simply a small adjustment. Opposite-sex couples are still able to marry. As to the rights of children, last time I check my two were still ok, as are my nephews and nieces. No impact at all. Also, it’s Sunday today, no churches have been harmed so freedom of belief endures.
The Australian Christian Lobby is disappointed that the Irish movement to redefine marriage, funded by $16 million US dollars, has succeeded at a national referendum today.
ACL Managing Director Lyle Shelton said, “Over $16 million US dollars has been provided to organisations to deliver same-sex marriage over a period of 12 years in Ireland.”
Actually Lyle, that would be illegal. Foreign entities may not fund or donate to Irish referendum campaigns. It is rather naughty of you to suggest it, especially since you seem to ignore the counter claims that the No vote has been funded by extreme right-wing American fundamentalist organisations.
Mr Shelton said despite the result in Ireland, Australia was different and he called on parliamentarians to carefully consider the consequences for children and to freedom of conscience.
“Australia should not pass a law which forces millions of Australians to pretend that a same-sex couple with children is the same thing as a mother and father with children.
Lyle is right – we are different. Our marriage act can be changed by parliament. No referendum is needed. In fact, it was former Prime Minister Howard, ably assisted by the current PM Abbott that changed the marriage act to make it clear that in Australia marriage is between one man and one woman for life. It’s ok, you can ignore the ‘for life’ bit if you like and get a divorce, but you can’t ignore the man and woman bit.
As to this rather silly notion that the law will force millions – millions I say – to ‘pretend’ that there’s something wrong with the kids of gay couples. I mean really Lyle. What are you going on about? You do know that already there are plenty of couples who aren’t married raising children? Some of those couples are married overseas but their relationship is not recognised here. And some of them are same-sex parents. And guess what – their kids are ok! Perhaps you should go and meet with some of them to find out how well they’re doing.
“The redefining marriage movement in Ireland made a big effort to downplay the rights and interests of children, which ought to be at centre stage of all public policy.
The No vote played this game very well and made it front and centre of their campaign. And guess what? The rest of Ireland saw through it and told them how silly they are.
“Because marriage confers the right to form a family, it will be very difficult to resist further law changes allowing the exploitation of women through commercial surrogacy.
No, marriage does not confer that right. We have a right to form a family and plenty of people do that without marriage. Even those who get married may choose not to have children. Surrogacy is an issue that is quite separate from marriage equality. In fact, the attempt to wave a red flag about the exploitation of women while talking about marriage equality is a nice attempt at distraction. The two aren’t connected.
“The only way the benefits of marriage equality can be provided to two men is to reform surrogacy laws so they have open access to donated women’s eggs and through the provision of ‘carrier’ wombs.
Uh huh. Benefits of marriage equality? What has this to do with two people getting married? It would seem Lyle that you are suggesting that the reason people get married is to have children. I don’t understand what makes you think this is a benefit of marriage as it can and does happen outside marriage. Surrogacy again is a separate issue not connected with marriage equality.
“While some same-sex couples are already acquiring children through various means of assisted reproductive technology, this does not make severing the primal bond between a child and their mother or father right.
Acquiring? Are you talking about a couple of women – you know, lesbians? Nobody acquires children. We have them. You also turn a blind eye to those thousands of children already adopted by same-sex and opposite-sex parents. This is the reality now and has been for a very long time. Quite frankly Lyle, this is a furphy.
“Marriage equality abolishes in law and culture the idea that, wherever possible, children have a right to both their mother and father.
Perhaps you can point to which law and which culture that says a child has this right. When you’ve found it then please embark upon a campaign to remove children from single parents, divorced parents and same-sex couples. Of course, marriage equality does not abolish anything of the sort.
“If gender matters for company boards and jury selection, then how can we deny that it matters for parenting?”
Huh?
Mr Shelton said the freedom of Christian and Islamic schools teaching the truth about gender complementarity in marriage would likely come into question if marriage was redefined.
You forget about the Jewish faith. And so it should come into question. You seem to be of the misunderstanding that christian and islamic schools have some sort of truth that places them outside reality. They don’t. What you’re saying is that homosexuality is morally wrong according to your ‘truth’. Time to get out and face the reality that there is nothing wrong with being gay, there is nothing wrong with being straight. How long must the rest of us sit back and allow you to use your religion to deny reality? The world isn’t flat anymore Lyle.
People providing services to the wedding industry, who because of conscience declined to participate in a same-sex wedding, would risk being punished under Australia’s anti-discrimination laws.
OK. So we don’t yet have marriage equality in Australia – so this isn’t really an issue. However, I would hope that if you are a baker, for example, and your website says that you make wedding cakes, then that’s what you do. If a couple arrives and you refuse to make a cake because of your conscience, then I’d suggest you are probably in the wrong business and if you are breaking the law then you should be prepared for the consequences. Are you really saying that religious people are outside the law? We get to work with lots of people every day and we don’t get to discriminate based on our conscience. It’s how we get along in life Lyle. And my suggestion to you is that you take a good hard look at your opposition to gay people getting married. The thing that is driving your protests is your christian belief. Let me quote it for you straight from your bible:
If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
So, if you want to talk about the right to exercise your religious conscience – is this what you mean?
Last night Michael and I along with Andrew, a friend, went out for dinner to a lovely Vietnamese restaurant in Fitzroy.
Michael dropped me off and drove off to find a car park. Andrew was waiting on the street for me. We greeted each other with a smile and a hello. I would have like to have kissed him on the cheek. A small gesture of friendship. The right way for me to greet him. But I didn’t. Nor did I shake his hand, because that just felt too formal and business like.
We three sat at a table and after a time the table next to us was taken by 4 men, clearly a couple of couples out for a similar night of good food and company.
Here we are, a group of homosexual men surrounded by straight people. All enjoying the company of our friends, eating, drinking, talking, laughing, looking.
I sit next to Michael because I like to be near to him. I rarely touch him in public. When I do there’s a risk analysis that my mind runs through before I reach out and place my hand on his knee or around his shoulder. I’m looking around me to see potential threats. Is that bearded bloke behind me with the tattoos of a skull on his elbow ok? Will that mother over there try to shield her daughter from me? Will the staff treat me differently?
Then I have to remind myself where I am. I’m in funky Brunswick Street, Fitzroy. It’s a pretty happening crowd with all sorts of people from all walks of life. Surely they’re all gay friendly? This won’t be an issue for anyone.
Only after that do I reach my arm out and place it around Michael’s shoulder. Michael responds to my touch by either touching my hand or relaxing into my arm and moving closer to me. It’s a natural, normal response. A shared intimacy that I love. Mind you, it only last a minute when I realise that he’s sitting to my right and my right shoulder aches too much for me to sustain it. I wonder if I always sit with him to my right as an unthinking way of protecting my perceptions of threats.
Nothing happens, of course, apart from my shoulder aching.
When I walk down the street, I never simply slip my hand into to his. Holding hands requires me to do another assessment of my surrounds. I’ve had the looks of both support and scorn from others. I’ve heard the phrase ‘faggot’ muttered when people pass me by. That, quite frankly, scares the fuck out of me.
When Michael visits me at work we always kiss each other on the cheek. What I really want is to be able to do that without thinking about it. The same way I don’t give a second thought to that goodbye kiss in the morning, or the hello kiss at the end of the day in the safety of our own home. I work in a wonderful diverse environment, and nobody raises an eyebrow about my sexuality. Yet, I still do a scan of where we are before and after a kiss.
Why don’t I feel safe in my own country?
The ongoing threat to safety is there for me. Real or perceived it doesn’t matter. Years of growing up in a world where gay people have been derided and despised takes it toll. Reports of gay bashing, discrimination and verbal abuse are presented to me on a daily basis.
I want to walk down the street and hold his hand.
I want to put my arm around him.
More than anything, I want him to sit to my left.
Take 20 minutes now and watch Panti speak at TED in Dublin.
The best place to smell the roses is Halls Gap in spring. Well, smell the wildflowers at least.
Michael and I headed up to the Grampians for a weekend recently to do just that, smell the wildflowers and enjoy the great outdoors. We left on a Friday night getting there late.
The first thing to strike me is the smell of the trees, then as you step out of the car the amazing array of stars spread across the sky above.
I think as I stop to soak it in how the First People who have lived here for over 10,000 years must have often looked up to the sky and looked in awe at the view. The black outline of the ridges that gives way to the brilliance of the stars. The First People called this place Gariwerd.
We started Saturday morning with a run from our motel out past Brambuk, the visitors centre, and back, just about 6 kilometres. My normal run is several times around the local running track, so to be out in the brilliant sunlight in the cool of the morning surrounded by towering mountains, the smell of eucalypt and the odd mob of kangaroos is a real treat.
From the top of Mt William looking towards Victoria Valley
After our breakfast our first stop is Mt William. The mountain is the highest peak in the Grampians at 1,167 metres. The mountain reminds me of my youth. Many times have I climbed to its peak and looked at the fantastic surrounds of the Western District and the Grampians ranges. It’s pretty easy to get to the starting point for our walk. You drive. The fun starts after you get out of the car. It’s just 2 kilometres to the top on a well paved road, however, it’s steep!
We wind our way up and around the zig-zag road. The day is beautiful. Bright sunlight, not too hot. Just perfect for a slug up a mountain side. The flora changes as we ascend. From the tall eucalypts to the stunted bushes of the semi-alpine area. There’s not much to stop the wind at the top as it whistles through the communications tower when we reach the summit.
It’s a hard slog, but well worth the effort. We scramble around on the plateau exploring the rocks and taking in the view. We head southwards towards the Major Mitchell Plateau, this is the one spot in the whole world that I want to return to. It’s an incredible hike that takes you down the side of Mount William to the valley floor then the steep climb up the side of the MMP. However, that’s an adventure for another day. All I can do is look at it for now.
The Major Mitchell Plateau from the top of Mt William
As we head back down the road to our car we pass a few people walking heading up – stopping to take plenty of photos, including a few of a 3 metre snake that winds its way across the road in front of us.
Once at the car we head on to Jimmy Creek to stop for a coffee, then onto Mafeking, home of the Grampians gold rush in the early 1900’s. We take a stroll around the old town where once 10,000 people lived. There’s nothing but bush here now, and a few mine shafts that have been covered up with wire mesh barriers to prevent you falling in.
Sunday morning dawns even brighter than the previous day. Today is wildflower day. It’s Halls Gap Annual Wild Flower Show, now into its 75th year.
A tree with character – click on it to see the larger version
First stop is the Botanic Gardens. I had no idea that Halls Gap had such a place. We wander around the gardens and look a the display of wildflowers on show. Mostly cut flowers put into old ice-cream tins. A permit is required to pick flowers in the Grampians, so not something you’d wander around the bush doing for a lovely display on the mantlepiece at home.
There’s this fantastic tree in the gardens. A survivor. Be sure to click on the image to the right to see the larger size, note the ice cream tin at the foot of the tree.
We wander through the exhibition in the local hall, grab some lunch and then head southwards again to Lake Bellfield.
We stop here, as we often do at Dairy Creek, the spot never disappoints with the local corella population taking up residence in the trees and making a fuss that only they can do. There seems to be thousands of the things gathered in the tree-tops. We stop for some photos.
Corella’s at Lake Bellfield
As we drive out I’m scanning the sides of the road looking for wild flowers. While it’s great to see the variety on display in an exhibition, what I really want to see is the real thing, flowers in the wild.
In my mind, looking at wild flowers means grasslands with huge stands of blossoms blowing merrily in the wind. The reality is quite different. The flowers here are tiny. Small delicate blossoms close to the ground and scatter among the dead twigs, leaves and other tiny plants.
Common Correa (Correa reflexa)
A flash of red and I stop the car. We get out and wander a few metres into the bush. There are the flowers, on the floor, barely 10 centimetres high with tiny flowers no larger than a 10¢ coin on the end of their slender stems. There’s a few here and there and we carefully trod our way through the undergrowth taking great delight in finding the perfect specimen to photograph.
Pink Fingers Orchid (Caladenia Carnea)
At one point I was crouched down looking at an exquisite orchid and as I looked up at ground level my eyes were greeted with the wonderful array of flowers close by, a wonderful moment of connection for me with my husband, the ancient ground beneath my feet, the beauty of the orchid forest in front of me and the mountains as the back drop. The warm sun, gentle breeze, the sounds of the corellas, currawongs,
kookaburras and the occasional magpie.
Another great weekend away in a place that I never tire of visiting. It gives me a sense of mental renewal to be among such staggering beauty with the man I love and the bush I enjoy and admire.
January 30, 2014
Stoneridge Estate
Queenstown, New Zealand
I ask everyone here today to witness that I Gregory Paul Storer choose you Michael Nathan Barnett to be my legal husband.
Michael, when we started our relationship, my online profile said that I understood my place in the Universe and that I was looking for the right person to share it with. I said that mental voids need not apply.
You have been able to challenge me, reason with me and help me grow into a different man. I have changed. I am now a wonderfully happy person, in love with a wonderfully happy person. You are no mental void but a man brimming with integrity, honesty, openness and love.
Michael today we face each other, I get to look into your beautiful eyes, watch your wonderful face and tell you why I’m here.
You know that I love you. You know that despite all the wrongs in our world, all the things outside our control and all the things that we control that I willingly look at you and say you are the one that I want to be with. You are the one that I choose to spend my time with.
I smile when I see you. I look for you when you’re not here. I revel in sharing the outdoors with you. I delight in our conversations about the world.
We walk through the bush and climb to the top of mountains and look in awe. These are times together that make my heart go zing. You make my heart go zing. It’s doing it right now.
So, today, with my heart going zing, I have surrounded myself with love. I have taken the most important people in my life and brought them here. I want the love that surrounds me, the love of my closest brother and sister, the love of my wonderful children, the love of my best friends, I want this love to surround me and I want it to surround you.
You too have brought to this place those you love, you have surrounded yourself with love.
There is here today over 200 years of marriage between our friends. We are engulfed by love.
I stand before everyone here to say to you that I love you.
Abbey knows that she’s just about at the end of her week-long letter writing campaign to the Prime Minister. She restates just what it is that she’s looking for.
The pillowcase would be jammed pack full of goodies. It always had a Santa stocking in it. The stocking, very similar to the one pictured, would have some lollies along with cheap plastic toys, such as a whistle or a water pistol. This is a tradition that I continued on with my own children until recently. I do have a memory of feeling the sack in the dark and it being big and bulky, I’d give it a tug and pull out whatever I could without making too much noise. I can’t recall a single gift from it, apart from the stocking.
There are two presents that stand out in my memory. One was a cassette recorder. The other a 
The Christmas pudding was made by my mother’s mum, Grandma. I have a fleeting recollection of it hanging in a calico bag from the kitchen ceiling, months before Christmas. It was boiled in a special aluminium steamer pot and served with lashings of cream. I recall my Dad’s mother, Nana, being responsible for putting the sixpence in the slices. Yes, sixpence, even years after the move to decimal currency, she managed to use sixpence.
We are a married couple. He is my husband. For me it was important that I find a way to say to my family, my friends, and the rest of the world how important this relationship is to me. What better way to share the way I feel about Michael than a public declaration of my love for him. What better way than marriage to say to this key person what he means to me.
